Generations are like seasons. This is true because generations and seasons are never like their predecessors. Last winter the weather was icy and snowy, the streets were covered in a baby powder colored mist, and I loved it because morning classes were always getting cancelled, meaning I could get a few more hours of sleep.
This winter, however, had a streak of days that felt more like spring than winter. With all of the 60 degree days in December I contemplated not buying a winter coat for the first time in ages.
Just like there are gaps in the temperament of the winter seasons there are gaps between generations. In older generations men were the breadwinners in the family nucleus, single parent households were frowned upon and women tended to be career mothers and housekeepers. In today's world women own their houses, make their own money and are arguably more career orientated than most men. Single parent households are the norm, personally, I only have one friend that lives with both his father and mother. I, as well as many of my other peers, live with a single mother and have loose connection with our fathers.
In the past women were groomed to be "womanly." Nowadays it is not unusual to know females with a traditionally "male" way of thinking. Women are more independent than ever and even pride themselves on their ability to do great in life without a man. Traditionally it was a custom for men to court females: ask their fathers for permission to take the woman he desired on a date, hold the door for her, and behave in a chivarlous manner toward her. It seems the roles have been reversed now though, or rather, they've been evened out over the years. It is now not uncommon for a woman to tenaciously approach the man she wants, and in a way court him.
What do you feel is the cause of these changes? Is it women taking control of their destinies or is it men not stepping up to the plate? As a women would you ever consider proposing to the man you love instead of waiting for him to ask your hand in marriage? Discussions are encouraged. Feel free to speak your mind respectfully, but please, keep all topic discussions in the comment box below. Thanks and be sure to follow the blog!
-Egleaves
Featuring my Poetry, Short Stories, Prose, Music reviews, My thoughts and my opinions of the world. Discussions are welcome!
Times have changed, but I think this an incredibly complex subject. For example, when I was 18 while studying in Italy I was told I was too forward (and by forward, I went to grab his hand!) and he was turned off by it. He was a Baptist from Texas, and he informed me that in the future I should wait for a guy to make ALL of the moves.
ReplyDeleteI still prefer the man to court me though, especially if I don't yet have an interest. I think guys forget that sometimes they have to do something. Regardless, I think the most interesting part of this subject has to do with women embracing their sexuality. I think it's great, but I also think that in many ways it has destroyed dating. I still go on traditional dates etc and guys seem to attempt court me, but I have a plethora of friends who have NEVER been on a date, but have "dated" guys or have hooked up with a guy steadily. I think guys can get what they want with out having to put in as much of the effort. Here is a quote from article I searched: "This sexual revolution has many other consequences. Women are freed from being the passive member in the
initiation of a relationship; they are freed from the traditional societal requirement of being bashful and inhibited in a
relationship. It is now acceptable for women to pursue guys for a date, dress sexy and desirably, and to act sexually
assertive in a relationship. This and the fact that women reach the stage of desire to live in committed relationship
earlier than men has created a culture of women chasing men"
Anyway, my goal has been to be independent, and while I am glad I can embrace myself, I still feel like women live in this paradoxical world where we can't always fully win. I think it is about finally taking charge of our destinies, but this is still a complicated road to navigate. I don't believe I'd propose - I think it is still ingrained that a man should, in men's minds as well. I'm not going to marry someone who doesn't absolutely want to marry me, so I would wait for him to ask to know that this was the case. I asked my prom date to prom, but I like this gender role, I would rather have a guy be creative and thoughtful and propose to me than vice-versa.